Living with self-doubt

What is this… It’s destructive, ball breaking and a total passion and creativity killer, it can swing your mood from brilliant to victim within a matters of seconds if you let it. It’s created externally but driven internally. It can make you feel like a drug addict with high highs and low lows. It’s addictive and soul destroying, making you need it when you don’t want it! What is it – it’s self doubt!

For ways to break down the wall of this self imposed prison read my article on ‘Living with self doubt’

Yesterday, during her VIP Day (a 1:1 power session with me privately) my beautiful client wanted to go to the next level but didn’t realise quite how paralysing the emotional prison she’d built herself was.

~ A successful businesswomen busting through the glass ceiling. ~

A businesswoman in her late 30s, she was successful in her own right. She’s created a career she loves although she’s ready to bust through the glass ceiling and go to the next level, she had great friends who she wanted to deepen connections with and most importantly she wanted to fall in love with who she was as a person. She knew there was something still left untapped, unanswered or unresolved. She felt she always needed to prove herself but had forgotten what she was trying to prove. She wanted to serve a higher purpose but was confused with how to do it. And when we drilled down into what I fondly refer to as the ‘inner gunk’ we discovered one of the core issues was she didn’t respect herself which caused her to sabotage the success she deserved. On her agenda to produce is deep connections with close friendships, a loving partner, healthy body and rewarding career, feeling comfortable in her own skin so she can embrace opportunities. She shared her deepest desire is to love who she is and what she’s up to in the world.

~ We need a new internal scriptwriter ~

So we set to work, immediately sacking the internal scriptwriter that was currently writing the scenes for the lack of confidence, jealousy, victim mindsets she was currently experiencing. We instated a new one and began to edit the story lines of what no longer served her. She was ready to face the tough questions and my role was to ask them in such a way that she felt safe to explore the answers.

~ Living behind the wall of self-doubt ~

She’s graciously let me share this photo. This is the wall of self doubt she was living behind and wondered why she wasn’t producing the life she’d love to live. Each brick in her wall had a negatively charged story connected to it as to why it was true for her. Some bricks had multiple stories attached, all powerfully demonstrating the evidence she needed to feel like she’d failed .

~ Hot and heavy action scene overcoming adversity ~

Without first learning the positive intentions that lay waiting at the root cause of each story, she would never have been free. Once we identified the trigger points and understood the core message, we were able to change the inner script so she could begin a brand new way of living. We cried, we laughed and we let off multiple party poppers as celebrations for the many breakthroughs and insights. When I asked her at the beginning of the day what type of movie she felt like she was in, she replied, “it was more like a French tragedy and now she wanted to live a more hot and heavy action scene where she is the heroine overcoming adversity to save herself and positively contribute to the planet”. Now that’s a great role to play.

If you’re interested in having a blockbuster session of your own, here are some tips:

  1. Identify what negative labels you use about yourself (these are your bricks that weigh you down and build an impenetrable wall)
  2. Spotlight the feeling you experience when you believe it to be true and the story you run that backs it up
  3. Get honest with yourself – these projections make you feel bad so who do you need to become in order for you to produce a different ending?
  4. Write out the list of new attributes, put it in your wallet and devote all of your energy and attention to being that person

~ The starring lead in her life of choice ~

It’s amazing what happens to someone when we get the support we need to shine. Within one-day my client shifted from playing a shitty bit part in a soap opera to becoming the starring lead in her life of choice. She’s also taken on the roles of directing and producing the results she actually wants rather than being the by-product of circumstance!

And whats super cool, at the conclusion of the day, she left with a jab of inspiration feeling wowed about her own capacity to be brilliant now. — at Be Brilliant Now HQ.

Julie-Anne ‘Jewells’ Black is an international speaker, author and creator of Be Brilliant Now. Her training programs show emerging leaders how to be bold, sassy and influential communicators in life and business.

She’ll help you escape Groundhog Day, direct their future and be the star of their life.

Julie-Anne combines 22 years experience to share the secrets she’s learnt both on camera and behind the scenes as a production manager for the Sydney Olympic Games Opening Ceremony and top television producer for some of Australia’s favourite TV shows including Who Wants To Be A Millionaire. She’s been interviewed for radio in Australia and USA and featured in publications CLEO, MX and Executive PA among others.

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