Ingredients For Being YOU

My recipe to be brilliant now…


  • me willing, capable, committed and compelled
  • 1-2 litre water
  • 2 cups of trust
  • 2-10 cups adventure and fun
  • 1 cup of resourcefulness
  • 2 handfuls of encouragement
  • 1 tablespoon of clarity
  • A few drops abundance
  • Generous sprinkle of love


  1. First, create a relaxed, comfortable space for brilliance to occur, adding water and trust immediately.
  2. Sift in necessary amounts of adventure and fun adding a dash of resourcefulness when ready.
  3. Gently peel away any anxiety, limiting beliefs and traces of fear before stirring in generous handfuls of encouragement and clarity.
  4. Turn courage up to high and sprinkle with love and abundance.
  5. Bake until happy from the inside out.

Serve with ice-cream (optional)

Funny, how simple it can be to create your ingredients of being you. Or is it… I get really curious as to why we take it so seriously to be able to describe who we are as a person. I heard someone share the other day, “it’s as if the moment I articulate who I believe I am in that moment that needs to be me from that day forward, so instead I choose not to share or perhaps not to even know, consciously. If I’m going to be persecuted for who I think I was yesterday I’m better off not disclosing it, right?!@! After all I’m not even sure of who I am let alone being able to say it out loud.”

That’s not entirely true though is it? Cos sometimes you know absolutely who you are, what you stand for and where you belong.

Sometimes it’s just cos we get tangled and unsure because we simply don’t spend enough time with ourselves gently and quietly exploring who we are.

So, what if we thought about it by baking a cake? Here’s the way we prepared earlier…

First we decided exactly what cake we wanted to bake.

Your own method of deciding is just perfect.  You might see a picture of it, someone told you about it or maybe you just know what you feel like.

Once you had decided which cake, you’d go about finding and gathering the necessary ingredients.  You’d then work through the recipe combining the ingredients in the ‘appropriate’ order. There is a syntax that is required for the cake to come out just right for example the recipe says to ice the cake after it’s been baked!

You’d line the cake tin with butter and or paper and add the compiled mixture. Then it is ready to bake in the oven at a preset temperature. The smells begin to escape from the oven and you know it’s just about ready. You check it by patting the top, if it springs back you know it’s done. Taking it out of the oven you let it sit for 5-10 minutes before turning it onto a wire rack for cooling. Whilst cooling itself you make the icing. When ready you ice the cake. And voila – it is complete.

You make a nice cup of tea, cut a generously large slice and enjoy the fruits of your labour.

If on the other hand it didn’t turn out quite as expected – what do you do then? How do you act or rather react? The behaviour that is created at these times is sometimes more important than when you achieve success. What do you notice? How do you say to yourself? What do you feel? Hmm, the answers to these questions, although confronting, will give you great insight into how much you love and accept yourself. You see, we can all like / love ourselves when things are going well however the tables turn when they aren’t and this is where the magic can most often be found. By identifying these limits, fears, pains, learning their purpose, acknowledging why we used them and then forgiving yourself for doing so, creating a new pathway forward you can heal the deepest parts of yourself.

Now imagine using this metaphor for baking a cake to create the life you want? Do you know what you want? Are there any missing ingredients?  Do you know what they are? Or do you have all or some of the ingredients in the wrong syntax?

Have you ever taken the time to research and really think about what you want out of yourself, out of life and those around you – creating your own recipe for life?  Perhaps it seems boring, predictable, unromantic, time consuming, overwhelming, impossible…

What if it’s quite the opposite? What if creating your future the way you’d like it and then focussing on what’s possible will provide adventure and spontaneity like you’ve not yet known? What if by doing a little extra work now, by getting really clear, the future will be a place of relish and fun? Would that inspire you? If not, perhaps another question to ask would be ‘when are you going to get out of your own way so life can deliver what you want?’  Stop buying into your own limitations because this only helps create them and more!

Creating the ingredients for you to be the person you need to be, to do the things you want to do, to have the life you want to have, is not something to be taken too heavily.  Yes you will need a good dose of determination and grace as well as the uncompromising attitude that you can, will and must laugh with yourself. And remember you can make the recipe as simple or elaborate as you choose.

Looking inward discover and reacquaint yourself.

These questions will allow you to reflect:

  1. When things aren’t going exactly to plan what are you saying to yourself?
  2. Are there negative emotions coming to the fore?
  3. Which traits are now dominating?
  4. How quickly do you get back on track?
  5. How much lingering aftermath is there?
  6. How long do you allow it to linger for?
  7. What happens within you when the storm passes?
  8. What happens when everything works perfectly and you are truly enjoying life – what traits are shining?
  9. What positive emotions are coming to the fore then?
  10. What else is present when it’s working that aren’t visible when it’s not?
  11. How much celebration is there?
  12. How long do you celebrate for? Do you even celebrate?
  13. What happens after you move on to the next meal in life?
  14. What are your positive attributes and shining traits?

Note your answers and reflect especially to questions 8 – 14. Deliberately get curious as to how and why they work. What has to be present in order for you to feel great? What isn’t present in those moments? Then set out to replicate these empowering emotions and states whenever and wherever possible. Look inside because the answers and solutions reside within you, they always have!

Diamonds to assist you in creating your own recipe:

  1. Vision – know your outcome
  2. Knowledge / Skills / Techniques – prepare yourself, research, learn, experiment
  3. Plan / Instructions – create the recipe so it can be repeated many times over
  4. Action – make the cake
  5. Results – review your outcome
  6. Celebrate / Reward – always celebrate everything. Awareness is 95% of the journey.
  7. Practice / Repetition / Master – get ferociously curious and do it again & again & again.

© Be Brilliant Now

Julie-Anne ‘Jewells’ Black is an international speaker, author and creator of Be Brilliant Now. Her training programs show emerging leaders how to be bold, sassy and influential communicators in life and business.

She’ll help you escape Groundhog Day, direct their future and be the star of their life.

Julie-Anne combines 22 years experience to share the secrets she’s learnt both on camera and behind the scenes as a production manager for the Sydney Olympic Games Opening Ceremony and top television producer for some of Australia’s favourite TV shows including Who Wants To Be A Millionaire. She’s been interviewed for radio in Australia and USA and featured in publications CLEO, MX and Executive PA among others.

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